Let’s talk about rejection, failure and pain. The other day I was a bit bummed out because I faced a minor rejection. Although I could argue on a mental level that it was logical and didn’t matter, on an emotional level I had a hard time not taking it personal and felt unmotivated. So I was having a little pity party of my own.
I threw a pity party for me and my imaginary friends. I made a little paper hat for Lars, put on a happy beat and prepared a party cookie wishing many more rejections so I can become an even stronger person than I am today.
Because at one point I realized you should celebrate every rejection you get. It means you were vulnerable enough to put yourself out there. The more it hurts, the bigger the personal growth. It means that even though you knew you were placing yourself in an uncertain position, you were brave enough to at least try. And if it doesn’t work out the way you hoped for, that’s not something to feel sad about; it is a true sign of your awesomeness. No one will be successful in any way without trying and failing miserably a countless number of times.
Being happy is a real challenge. Because let’s face it, feeling miserable is a whole lot easier than getting yourself together and putting a smile on your face. When I was a little kid and I was sad or angry, my dad used to make me laugh. And I hated that, because I didn’t want to laugh, I just wanted to be angry and show the world how serious I was about it.
Nothing really changes. In a way we are still little kids with emotional needs. Pain only get’s a more subtle way of showing itself. Now it just happens to take forms like feeling unmotivated, being in a bad mood, feeling restless or sad.
I am not saying major life changing events don’t need time to heal. But I know that my ‘misery’ was irrelevant, useless and not in any way proportionate to what I made it into. It is in those small moments that we can choose the opposite of what we feel like, that will help us grow as a person. Because if we often turn our small moments of sadness into happiness, we will be better able to tackle the bigger pains in our life as well.
So you know what, next time you are feeling miserable, be the hero of your own life. It takes a certain amount of strength, but try to find the good in the situation and turn your place of pain into a place of power. Celebrate your failure, laugh about your mood swings and make room for positive thoughts. I know you can do it. Let’s take one small step at a time.